What It Means To Be Unruly
The most unruly thing we can do, is embrace who we are instead of trying to be who everyone thinks we should be.
Because we do not exist
for you.
to appeal to you.
to live, for you.
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Over the years, I’ve been asked [only ever by cis-white-men of various ages] if I had given the name Unruly Women serious enough thought, because using the word ‘unruly ’ might give off the ‘ wrong idea ’ .
I was told more than once, that I should probably change it, because I hadn’t thought it through.
Welp. I had thought it through. And now, almost 3 years later, I still find the word unruly perfectly fitting.
To exist exactly as I am, is a privilege that I’m acutely aware of. I am grateful that I stepped out of the life I thought I should be living, and instead chose what my soul yearned for. Unafraid of how others might perceive me, because as I tried to appeal to what I thought everyone else wanted and needed of me, I lost who I was. There is so much power, in embodying who we truly are.
photo by Riah Beth photography www.unrulywomen.org
U n r u l y , is the opposite of who we’ve been conditioned to be by society.
Everyone has an idea of who they think we should be, and trying to live up to someone else’s idea isn’t realistic. It’s exhausting and it will always leave us feeling like we are never enough.
✨
We are not here to be who and how society wants us to be and act - especially when the ‘ideal’ is constantly changing.
Our voices are worth hearing and are valid.
Our lives are worth living and we should be able to exist exactly as we are.
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To be U N R U L Y, is to:
• disrupt the idea that we need to do it the way it’s always been done… only because that’s the way it’s always been done.
• be who we are, as we are, unapologetically.
• exist fully embodied, instead of diluted, societally acceptable, polite versions of ourselves.
• speak truthfully, not to make ourselves more palatable or tolerable.
• be who we are, instead of who the world has told us we ‘should’ be.
• ‘walk away’ from what isn’t right for us
• leave any relationship that isn’t healthy for us
• say no without explanation
• wear as little or as much as we want, whenever and however we want
• rest
• live the life we dream of
• follow our intuition
• ‘stand up’ for each other, empower each other and cheer each other on
• help each other up when we’ve fallen down - and when we need a reminder of who the f*ck we are.
✨This, is what it means to be UNRULY. ✨
We ARE here to:
• disrupt the idea of who we are told we ‘should’ be and how we ‘should’ do it
• unlearn who society has conditioned us to be, to discover who we are
• take up space
• stop making ourselves smaller and quieter and pleasant
• do what feels right to our innermost self
• and dive into our most authentic and true self, and exist exactly as we want to in this world
WHY?
Because what the world needs, is less cookie-cutter, thoughtless, compliant people.
The world needs you.
Your uniqueness.
Your vision and your drive.
Ask why, and try doing it differently.
To be unruly, isn’t to be defiant just for the hell of it.
To be unruly, is to be the opposite of who this world conditioned us to be.
To be unruly is to speak directly and confidently, to be wild and untamed, to take up space, to be fearless, and to follow our intuition.
To step outside of the boxes that were designed to make us feel out of place if we stepped anywhere but where we were told to.
Dive inward.
Unearth your authentic self.
Learn to listen to your intuition - and differentiate it from ego and scarcity.
See your compassion and understanding and warmth as strengths, not weaknesses.
See your drive and ideas as innovation that could change the world.
Take a step into the discomfort zone, towards the person you’re becoming.
Embody the life of your wildest dreams.
Be u n r u l y.
Unruly Women has always been and will always be about unearthing your inner wild, discovering your most authentic self and empowering you to speak your truth and embody the life of your wildest dreams.
Mountain Biking, backpacking, hiking, volunteering and writing are the catalysts to help you discover your purpose and to empower you to do the things that ignite your internal fire.
Helping to diversify outdoor recreation and create inclusive, accessible and equitable outdoor spaces, is Unruly Women’s mission, and just one small piece of a very large pie. Fighting for equal human rights and dismantling systemic barriers, has never been easy and has historically and is most often done by the oppressed- because it’s their lives and rights they’re fighting for.
Our mothers and grandmothers didn’t fight for women’s rights, because it was easy. They did it, because they had to, because they wanted a better life for us. People aren’t fighting for their right to live right now because it’s easy, they’re doing it because they have to, because they want a better life for themselves and their future generations. There is no question that people who identify as BBIPOC and LGBTQIA2S+ face inequalities and inequities daily and disproportionally to their white counterparts, whether it’s in the workplace or recreating outdoors (as just two examples).
Everyone deserves to feel belonging and safe in all spaces.
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Sometimes I feel braver than others. Sometimes I let fear of what-if’s silence me. Maybe you can relate?
Some topics are easier to speak up about than others - what a privilege it is to not have to, and also to be able to.
I will never pretend to have all (or necessarily any) of the answers. But, I will try to do my best to speak up for the ones who can’t, and most of all, amplify the ones that do.
Below, are some examples of how you can be u n r u l y .
There are infinite ways that you can speak your truth and stand up for what you believe :
call your state reps
Post on social media, mindfully (make sure to fact check, not just click bait )
speak up for inequity and inequality (especially in the workplace + outdoors)
speak up for those who are being discriminated against for their racial, gender-expansive, and/or sexual identities (especially in the workplace + outdoors), amplify their voices
speak up against social injustices, amplify the voices of those effected most
Talk about the tough topics with friends and families (raise awareness)
Attend protests
Write letters / sign petitions
Vote
Listen to and amplify the voices of those who have been historically and presently, silenced
Say yes, when every part of you screams yes!
Say no, when any part of you hesitates.
heal through therapy, so your life won’t be filtered or projected through your wounds
Write poetry, a book, tell your story
Walk away from a job that doesn’t align with your values
Leave an unhealthy relationship
Live a life that is authentically you, unapologetically.
Incorporate time for rest, self care, favorite activities, and with loved ones into your life
Let go of the belief that high productivity is simultaneous with success and growth.
There is no right or wrong way to ‘speak up’ , no all-or-nothing, every little bit helps, you need to do what feels right to you — and you never know where that will lead you, or who you might inspire.
Be safe, rest, hydrate, and do the things in this life that fuel your soul. We’re here for each other, and so much stronger together in community.
Be U N R U L Y.
If this speaks to you, be sure to sign up for the Unearth Your Inner Wild Creative Writing and Journaling Workshop Saturday February 17th. If you want to learn more, click here! :)
***Disclaimer: I write from my own personal experience and my writings are to be interpreted as such. I cannot speak for those who encounter inequity and inequality for their identities that are not my own, but , I will amplify their voices to be heard and help to raise awareness and fight for equal human rights. I encourage you to use your own critical thinking when making decisions and major life choices. As always, you are your own person, capable of making your own decisions regardless of external influences - take no shit but do no harm. ***
